쉬즈 더 맨

[To Monique, breaking up with her] You're hot Monique, smokin' hot. But there are plenty of hot girls out there. And the truth is you have nothing else to offer! And when my eyes are closed, I see you for what you truly are, which is UUUG-LAY!

Monique: [in response to Andrew's flirting] Ew, what are you, hitting on me? Let me put a stop to that little brain fart right now. Girls with asses like mine do not talk to boys with faces like yours.

I'd tap that.

[to Duke] What does you heart tell you? [pause] I mean... which one would you rather see NAKED!?

Okay, how come when I wanted to ask Eunice out everyone made fun of me, but then Sebastian likes her and suddenly she's cool? Screw you guys. I hate high school.

Olivia: [When Malcolm, telling her his tarantula is loose, says she should not feed it] Yes, because my first instinct would be to feed the turantula.

[tears up the manual containing the "no girls allowed" policy, before returning it to the referee] What manual? Listen, pal. Here at Illyria, we don't discriminate based on gender!

Paul: Just remember, inside every girl, there's a boy. [pause] That came out wrong, but you know what I mean.

So, uh, you play the beautiful game... bros... brothers... brethren?

[to Viola (as Sebastian)] Why, why do you always talk about girls in such graphic terms?