Duplex

It's pissin' down out there!

[after Alex spills the garbage on the stairway and, disgusted, holds up Mrs. Connelly's underwear with a paper towel roll] What in heaven's name are you doin' with me drawers!?

It's loose as a Dublin whore!

It's horrible. My parents read this magazine. Now they know my penis is called Mr. Peabody!

Hello, Mr. Peabody!

She puts on this sweet voice. "Nancy, could ya help meh, eh? I think I've found the leavings of a mouse!" Boo, hoo, hoo! As if she didn't know it was a raisin!

Officer Dan: It's my experience that wives don't accidentally shoot their husbands in the penis.

Upchuck is a delicacy for Little Dick. He's salivatin'.

Herman: I don't want it tickety boo, I want it tickety now!

[reading a dictionary entry] "Macaw: any long tailed, brightly-colored parrot." A macaw is a parrot, I knew it!

Tara: God, you're such a good squeezer, Nancy.

Could you give me a hand with the garbage? We don't wannna be feedin' the mice.

We forgot to christen the apartment.

She just manipulated me somehow. She's very crafty. She's a crafty old…lady.

Off we go, Dicky Boy.

[muffled sound of Mrs. Connelly's very loud t.v.] I saw myself in the mirror and I thought it was my mother's tush.

Blow me down!